
I was speaking with one the great people who bought my book (you buy my book you are the shit!) and he referenced a family of six that came to every auction and watched him like a hawk. He told me they recounted every unit he had bought for the last six months with great accuracy. Often inquiring how well he did financially on each unit.
He was a little spooked, they were like auction Nazis and many people did not like them. For some reason they adopted him and kinda sorta schooled him. I told him they were concerned because they could not read him, so the get all in his business they befriended him.
This was a true case of keeping your enemy close at hand to gain important insights on how that person operates his business. The Clampetts did the same thing to me. I gave him a quick primer on auction subterfuge techniques, because they were in no shape, fashion nor form his friends. A sleeping snake can awake at a moments notice and bite you in the ass!
At this point I had tears rolling down my cheeks from laughing so hard. It still amazes me that the auction culture is so similar from state to state. That was a concern, I had writing the book. However, many grateful customers alleviated those fears; the knowledge works pretty much anywhere because auction people exhibit the same traits regardless of geographical location.
I told him we have a similar family here in the metro Atlanta area. I nicknamed this clan “The Clampetts” except the Beverly Hill Billy’s had more “couth”. The name stuck and for many of us it was an inside joke which went on for years. Everyone has a nickname at the auctions (you may not know it but you do) mine was “Lucky” from the unit in Conyers.
Ma Clampett was about 4’11 due to the severe curvature of the spine, Elly May showed early evidence that the same fate would befall her later in life. (Maybe this is why Elly May was mean as hell) Ma Clampett was also a squint eyed, foul mouth, highly unattractive troll that loved being the center of attention (in the beginning we could not stand each other, later we move to tolerating each other).
Pa Clampett was one of the smallest men I ever known, if he was one hundred and twenty pounds I would be surprised. A Mason with a hound dog look about himself with a frock of silver hair. He did have a youthful appearance that belied he was on the north side of sixty, he was a funny dude. Think of your favorite uncle who is admonishing you for some misdeed but is handing you candy behind his back. This was Pa Clampett.
He was always talking trash and starting stuff, for the most part he was a good fella, things only got out of had when the trolls showed up. Elly May did not like me nor did I care for her evil, sneaky ass. If she was at a auction I knew she was going to bid against me. Early on, when I did not know the game it was like why?
Then the dark side said “fuck it”, let the war begin. For about three years we went at each other. Emily May ran me up on a great unit on North Side Drive to the tune of $1500.00 which if she was not there I would have gotten it for $500.00 but it was a great unit and I made sure she got third party information on what she lost out on, yes I was that dude.
Elly May could have been a nice person, but the apple does not fall far from the tree. With Ma Clampett as a guiding force she had not choice but to be a rat. The other daughter was an outcast of sorts, she was nice! Elly Ma was on the slim side with dark, hair and eyes that made everyone that met here voice the same sentiment “I just don’t trust that chic”
Elly May’s husband was actually quite nice and smart ( a Boston University Grad) he was about 6 “7 and looked like Baby Huey he was the Jertho Bodine of the clan in looks, call it the reverse idiot savant syndrome.
He did not really come out that much; he helped with the loading of the units. After I got my business up and running, they started backing off, as a store owner I knew exactly where to hurt them and I did hurt them for a minute, it cost me some loot short term but long term I saved a lot of money because the harassment ended. Call it the balance of power.
The End

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